This Time of Year

It’s December.

I get busier in my head in December. I make more plans. I spend more money. I bake more. I visit more. I get overwhelmed more. I realize my need more. In December.

The celebrations of a year, good or bad, are had. The celebrations of lives and of bounty are had. Reminiscence abounds. Sharp clear pictures of my childhood pop into my thoughts all day long.

When I was a young mother, you would often have found me up at all hours of the night sewing or putting finishing touches on presents. When I went to work at night I would often bring children’s costumes for Christmas programs with me to sew on breaks. I ran myself ragged much of the month of December, “being present” as much as I could. With only twenty-four hours to a day, I tried to squeeze a good twenty-eight hours out of them…

Now on the other side of mothering, well into the Mimi stage and retirement phase, I can look with some thoughtful eyes at how I ‘did’ December; and how I want to ‘do’ December.

Peace on Earth is real. I can rest. I can go to bed at 10 pm and get a good nights sleep. I can sew if I want, during the day. I can wrap presents when I buy them so I don’t have a mountain to do on December 24th OR just not wrap them at all… I can actually mail out Christmas cards BEFORE Christmas or I can send New Year’s cards and feel okay about it. So many years of guilt with sending greetings late… WHERE does that even come from!? NOT from the Savior of the world!

Christmas is the celebration of Jesus. I lose sight of this in all the busyness of December. My husband, who is very unencumbered by the hustle and bustle, constantly reminds me of this truth. The celebration of the GIFT given to us is what Christmas is really about. Everything in the celebration points to Him. So many of my years have been spent whirling around accomplishing much and enjoying little. When called to be still; at school Christmas programs, watching a Christmas movie, driving through beautifully lit neighborhoods enjoying Christmas lights, hearing Silent Night sung on the lips of my sweet babies; I felt such a sweet relief. How little I appreciated in that time of my life. I didn’t know then what I know now.

How did I get so far off track in my celebrating through the years? My barometer for ‘off track’ was my stress and exhaustion level.

In this season, I am learning to enjoy the stillness, to listen quietly, to be unshackled by the ‘have to’s and ‘should do’s’. This is not an easy thing for one inclined to fill her days with flurries of movement and tasks. But such a worthy thing. It is worthy to pursue.

So, yes, I will pursue peace. I will celebrate Jesus. I will give. I will dance. I will reminisce. I will cook. I will write cards. I will rejoice in all the beauty and the life around me and share it with the people in my life. And I will rest. In December and every other month of the year…

Merry Christmas my friends and a Joyous New Year.

Love Betsy

“My peace I leave you, my peace I give you, not as the world gives, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid…” John 14:27